Jump to content
  • Welcome to AutoLanka

    :action-smiley-028: We found you speeding on AutoLanka Forums without any registration! If you want the best experience, please sign in. Safe driving! 

Why A Car Is Better Than A Woman


Sifaan

Recommended Posts

Hi all...

You've probably seen the "Ten Reasons why Chocolate/Sheep/a Computer is better than a Woman" (or Man) type jokes... just wondering how many we can come up with why a Car is better than a Woman. Here's a few to start the ball rolling:

1. A car has brakes

2. You can scream at a car and it won't scream back

3. A car protects you with an airbag before it hits you on the head

4. It's OK to get someone else to tune your car

5. A car doesn't mind being driven by different people

6. A car doesn't mind if you drive other people's cars

PS and also why a Car is like a Woman:

1. It costs an arm and a leg if you want to keep it looking good

2. Allowing external appearance to influence the purchase decision can lead to grief

3. It can start acting funny if you don't maintain it regularly

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi all...

You've probably seen the "Ten Reasons why Chocolate/Sheep/a Computer is better than a Woman" (or Man) type jokes... just wondering how many we can come up with why a Car is better than a Woman. Here's a few to start the ball rolling:

1. A car has brakes

2. You can scream at a car and it won't scream back

3. A car protects you with an airbag before it hits you on the head

4. It's OK to get someone else to tune your car

5. A car doesn't mind being driven by different people

6. A car doesn't mind if you drive other people's cars

PS and also why a Car is like a Woman:

1. It costs an arm and a leg if you want to keep it looking good

2. Allowing external appearance to influence the purchase decision can lead to grief

3. It can start acting funny if you don't maintain it regularly

4. Both have front buffers to protect from minor accidents.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

7. If you get stuck on the way, you always can get a lift in another car

8. Variety can be chosen beforehand to achieve 'driving' pleasure - I mean Auto, Manual or Triptronic

9. Its always OK to rent a car

10. You can always 'peacefully' park 2 cars next to each other in your own garage

Edited by EVO_Croozer
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Guys

here is another one i got through a mail from friend if mine :) which similarity a women to a vehicle

Women are the best vehicles in the world

Because:-

---2 beautiful headlights in the front

---2 great bumpers at the back

---Self -lubricating when hot

---Finger touch ignition

---Automatic engine oil change every month

---Any type of pistons fit

---Multiple seating styles & adjustments

----Great accessories

---Highest mileage 9months wit just 5ml refill

---That?s why MEN are dying to get a ride....

thanks

Regards

sumith

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why a Car is like a Woman:

5. Its rather rare to find a well maintained stock one in original specs; All you see around are riced up or too expensive

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Guys

here is another one i got through a mail from friend if mine :) which similarity a women to a vehicle

Women are the best vehicles in the world

Because:-

---2 beautiful headlights in the front

---2 great bumpers at the back

---Self -lubricating when hot

---Finger touch ignition

---Automatic engine oil change every month

---Any type of pistons fit

---Multiple seating styles & adjustments

----Great accessories

---Highest mileage 9months wit just 5ml refill

---That?s why MEN are dying to get a ride....

thanks

Regards

sumith

Not only that

......Beautyful set of tyres

......Possible to drive in many ways

Ajith

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not only that

......Beautyful set of tyres

......Possible to drive in many ways

Ajith

eh? tyres are beautiful on a car (esp. low profile ones) but tyres don't look good on women (or men!)... or did you mean something other than the fat at the sides of the abdomen (aka love handles)?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not only that

......Beautyful set of tyres

......Possible to drive in many ways

Ajith

Hi Guys

I don't know whether we have any female members here in SL :)

if it is so it is advisable to stop these type of thread too

if not we will get arrested :o

thanks

regards

sumith

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15. You can make a car scream whenever you want to.

16. Once you sell your car and move on, it doesn't keep following you around for years wanting to be 'friends'.

17. Years can pass and your car will still be looking good.

18. A car never ever nags.

19. Buying accessories for a car is a fun past time, no matter how much expensive they are.

20. Car's don't get PMS.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Guys

I don't know whether we have any female members here in SL :)

if it is so it is advisable to stop these type of thread too

if not we will get arrested :o

If my wife finds out I started this thread, I wouldn't mind being arrested... would be safer in a cell than at home! :blink:

But any lady members can just as well start a thread why Cars are better than Men (e.g. 1. they are not obsessed about sex )

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15. You can make a car scream whenever you want to.

16. Once you sell your car and move on, it doesn't keep following you around for years wanting to be 'friends'.

17. Years can pass and your car will still be looking good.

18. A car never ever nags.

19. Buying accessories for a car is a fun past time, no matter how much expensive they are.

20. Car's don't get PMS.

21.you can drive it again in the morning also, even if you had a late night drive...

and did anybody say " Love handles.." rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :smilie_liebe9:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

19. Buying accessories for a car is a fun past time, no matter how much expensive they are.

following on,

22. When you go shopping for car accessories, you're in control, not the car

23. A car will never ask "Do I look good in these" (although sometimes that's a downside... remember the A6 and the LED strips :huh: )

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thats not what you said when you parked at Marine Drive and crows used it for bombing practice :lol:

:P

aaannnd you keep reminding me Peri...I dunno why those black f**kers kept pooping on poor ol' Delly when there was a nice juicy RX8 parked beside it dammit...I swear them birds had severe Diarrhea. :lol

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Copied the following & amended as follows:-

Your Motorcar doesn't get upset when you forget it's birthday.

You don't have to talk to your Motorcar after you drive it.

You can choke your Motorcar.

Your Motorcar doesn't get mad when you ignore it for a month or so.

Motorcars don't get jealous if you come home with grease under your fingernails.

Motorcars don't snore.

Your Motorcar won't wake you up at 3:00 AM and ask you if you love it.

Your Motorcar won't leave you for another driver.

You don't have to pay child or income support to an ex-Motorcar.

If you say bad things to your Motorcar, you don't have to apologise before you can drive it again.

If your Motorcar doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.

If your Motorcar goes flat, you can fix it.

If your Motorcar is mis-aligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.

If your Motorcar is too loose, you can tighten it.

If your Motorcar is too soft, you can get different shock-absorbers.

If your Motorcar makes too much noise, you can buy a silencer.

If your Motorcar smokes, you can do something about it.

It's always OK to use tie downs on your Motorcar.

Motorcars always feel like going for a ride.

Motorcars don't care about how many other Motorcars you have driven.

Motorcars don't care about how many other Motorcars you have.

Motorcars don't care if you are late.

Motorcars don't get pregnant.

Motorcars don't have parents.

Motorcars don't insult you if you are a bad driver.

Motorcars don't mind if you look at other Motorcars, or if you buy Motorcar magazines.

Motorcars don't whine unless something is really wrong.

Motorcars last longer.

Motorcars only need their fluids changed every 2,000 miles.

Motorcars' curves never sag.

New Motorcars must be asked for, and if you don't want to pay for them, you don't get them.

You and your Motorcar both arrive at the same time.

You can have any colour Motorcar and show it to your parents.

You can kick your Motorcar to wake it up.

You can drive a Motorcar as long as you want and it won't get sore.

You can drive a Motorcar any time of the month.

You can share your Motorcycle with your friends.

You can't get diseases from a Motorcar you don't know very well.

You don't have to be jealous of the guy that works on your Motorcar.

You don't have to convince your Motorcar that you're a motorcyclist and that you think that Motorcars are equals.

You don't have to deal with priests to register your Motorcar.

You don't have to take a shower before driving your Motorcar.

You only need to get a new chain or belt for your Motorcar when the old one is REALLY worn.

Your Motorcar never wants a night out alone with the other Motorcars.

Your parents don't remain in touch with your old Motorcar after you dump it.

Your Motorcar doesn't care what you're wearing when you take it out.

Wearing four fresh rubbers makes a ride in a Motorcar more enjoyable.

The rashes you get from Motorcars go away without those painful Penicillin shots.

One gets in no trouble for storing disassembled pieces of the Motorcar in the basement.

Disassembling the Motorcar is done out of pleasure rather than need.

Motorcars always sound pleasant.

Unlike women fat Motorcars aren't cheap dates.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

AutoLanka Cars For Sale

Post Your Ad Free [Click Here]



×
×
  • Create New...